I weep like a child for the past

Piano
D.H. Lawrence

Softly, in the dusk, a woman is singing to me;
Taking me back down the vista of years, till I see
A child sitting under the piano, in the boom of the tingling strings
And pressing the small, poised feet of a mother who smiles as she sings.

In spite of myself, the insidious mastery of song
Betrays me back, till the heart of me weeps to belong
to the old Sunday evenings at home, with the winter outside
And hymns in the cosy parlour, the tinkling piano our guide.

So now it is vain for the singer to burst into clamour
With the great black piano appassionato.  The glamour
Of childish days is upon me, my manhood is cast
Down in the flood of remembrance, I weep like a child for the past.

Recently, I stay at in the library for graduate school, reading literature and writing.
When I was doning exercises for literary terms today, something happened.

I was reading the entry: simile and metaphore, and there's an exercise for categorizing the examples.
I turned the page, and this sentence came to me immenently:

"I weep like a child for the past"

This sentence, like a heavy hammer, ruthlessly smote my heart again and again.
I didn't know what's wrong with me. I was petrified, like paralyzed by Medusa. I felt a great claw clipped me by the throat, strangling my soul out of my nostrils. Terrofied and breathless, it's a rare case that I, all of a sudden, am seized and overrun by sentiment.

I weep like a child for the past. It's obvious this is a simile in which the tenor is I, a child the vehicle.
What really matters is: can any groun-up, expecially a man, cry like a child?

When I cried my heart out last time?
I don't know. Maybe I've cried before, but the memory about tears cannot be saved in my memory.
It's like a lost files in the hard disc, hard to find it out. I did cried loudly, I think, and I also think it's gone with my vaguely-rememered childhood.

There are reasons for weeping, sobbing, crying, or even mourning.
It's weird the first one came to my mind was 大喧.
I really want to ask her: Did you cried loud out  without any restraint and confinement?
I hope I can cuz I want to shout, yell, and roar toward my life and pathetic, lost past.

I noticed that Lawrence uese "weep" instead of cry. So the poor child's tears come down with suffer from holding it.
It's even more heart-breaking to sob, crying without making any sound or being noticed.

Has the weep let go some negative feelings? Or it'll fortifies it, makes it ten times stronger
and harder to sustain?

Anyway, I did weep like a child then.
Mariane was setting next to me so I dared not let go the tears.

For the past? Maybe, but no use, I think.

So, I just wept silently with tears running over my wretched heart.