2007年12月1日 星期六

等待果陀


我等待著果陀
看路邊樹梢沾著清晨露珠
有一人走過
「嗨,早安」
他點了點頭
「嗨,早安」
我依舊數著腳邊的石子與苔痕
等待著遲來的果陀

(暫停)

多少過往腳步踏上我的影子
那已經被夕陽拉的─好長、好長
一位流浪漢悄悄走到樹旁,坐下
對著不語的大地濤濤不絕,他說:
「基於這理由,康得提出了這樣的見解。這是不可信的、無理的、毫無根據的、荒謬的說法。以我所見,這一切都應立基於基督超乎一切的神性上,喔,哈雷路亞!眼前的一切都是無恥、可笑。正因如此,所以,因為這樣,由此可知。」

我依舊想著他的話,讚許的點了點頭
等待著遲來的果陀


(暫停)

他怎麼還不來他怎麼還不來
這一個世紀都等著他
他不能不來
我起了身子理理衣袖
樹上的葉子片片掉落
我坐下,拍拍身上灰塵,支著頭皺著眉
(沉默)
我在做什麼?
喔...
我依舊玩著手指
等待著遲來的果陀

(暫停)

「走吧!」
月亮已經爬上樹頂
影子早被黑暗所淹沒
沒了光沒了風沒了瘋言瘋語
但我不能走
「為什麼不走?」
因為
我依舊將生命綁在永恆的輪軸之上
等待著遲來的果陀

2007年11月26日 星期一

Oui-Ja Board

I.
It’s an ordinary afternoon in July. At this moment of a day, it’s hot and humid. The moisture in the atmosphere seemed to muffle people when they were talking. By observing the sweat dripping from their T-shirts’ sleeves, it’s definitely gonna have a thunder shower in a while. Pedestrians on the streets, poisoned by the heat, dragged themselves into the air-conditioned buildings. Suddenly, an eye-stinging flash ran across the sky, and then, with a sonorous cracking, the heavy rain poured down and drove the zombie-like people under shelters.
When the bolts ran out of control in the sky, a van loaded with furniture, clothes, utensils and some miscellaneous stuff drove slowly into this rain-washed neighborhood. It’s the Kims who had bought this old cottage 2 months ago. The van pulled off in front of the garage, and a man came out of the van, yelling:
“Susan, bring the kids into the house. You get the keys, right?
Helmay, help your mother with the bags. Charlie, get off the
car right away, and get into the house.”
Closing the car doors, Mr. Kim tried to drag some heavy suitcases out of the vehicle.
“Mac, I can’t open the door. Are you sure it’s the right key?”
“Try the silver one!” Then the door opened.
Mac Kim, with two heavy suitcases in hands, slogging through the front yard and awkwardly moved the luggage onto the hallway.
“Hooooo, here’s our new home! The rain doesn’t come at the
right time. It should show some welcome! May, help your mom
check the kitchen and rooms, ok? I’ll finish the moving.”
“Not me again! Charlie can help, too! Eight-year-old is enough to help”
“Do as I said, you…”
A dazzling streak slashed the sky into halves. Little Charlie cried aloud.
“Take your brother into his room, hurry.”
The rain didn’t show any sign of stopping. Standing at the hallway, Mac stared at the murky sky and the non-ceasing rain.
“Damn it, the first day of moving in comes with this shit weather.
The whole moving process must be postponed.”
When Mac was about going into the house, he noticed there’s a blurred figure in the shade of the opposite doorway. It seemed like an aged man, sitting in a weel-chair with a brown blanket covering his legs.
“Hello, I’m Mac Kim. I’ve just moved here today”
Because of the blowing wind and the splashing rain, Mac had to raise his volume into yelling. Maybe it’s the noisy sounds around, the old man didn’t react to Mac’s words.
“Maybe it’s just not the time”, thought Mac. So he waved a good-bye and returned to the house.
However, Mac didn’t notice there was a pale, rigid face which leaned against the door poll and watched Mac go behind the door.

II.
It had been two months since the Kims moved to this little county. Life here seemed to be well with these new comers. The two kids were quickly accustomed to their new school lives and friends. Mrs. Kim knew exactly where to shop and the address of the laundry shop. Mr. Kim, after a few BBQ parties on weekends, became one of the community members. He knew almost everyone, everyone here but the elder he saw at the first day he moved here. He knew only that his name is Robert Koncinson. The Koncinson family had been here since the colonial time, and he, at present, is the oldest resident in this neighborhood. The Koncinsons were prosper and owned most of the assets in this country. Even Mac’s house used to be the Koncinson’s property. Robert used to have a big family, yet about 10 years ago, his sons and daughters died one after another. It’s said a terrible big fire took everything from him.
“A poor man he is. Maybe I should visit him some other time,” said
Mac once on a Saturday party.
“I won’t, if I were you,” said Ferder, Mac’s colleague and neighbor.
“Mr. Koncinson is definitely a weirdo in this area. He has been living
alone for years.Most of the time, he just sits at the hallway, watching
people go by. But, sometimes, he makes some strange, sharp noises to frighten the passersby, or even curses the kids who accidentally steps on his lawn.”
“What he curses about?”
“I don’t know…something like: you little demon, leave me alone!
Sometimes he even begs for God’s mercy to banish these two-hoofed little Satans to Hell.”
“Insane. He always says the same words?”
“Yes, much the same. So children here are forbidden to get close to the Koncinson’s house, In case of the unpredictable madness.”
“So I have better bid Helmay and Charlie away from him.”
“You should.”

III.
“Helmay, I’m going to do the laundry and buy some groceries. Daddy has a
meeting tonight. Before we come home, don’t sneak out and stay
home with Charlie, ok?”
“I know I know, ok.”
Helmay and Charlie were left in the house. Charlie sat dully in front of the tube, watching the stupid Disney channel’s exclusive programs for kids. Helmay lay in her bed, tossing back and forth to kill the boring afternoon.
“Why should I stay here with the stupid kid,” murmured Helmay.
At this moment, an idea ran into her mind.
“Charlie, do you know we have an attic on the third floor?”
“Yes?”
“Mom bade us not to leave the house. So we stay here. Wanna take a
look and check the attic?”
“I’m not sure…isn’t it just a storage room?”
“Yes, but I saw some boxes already there when I helped daddy save
some groceries there. Maybe the former landlord left something in the attic.”
“Like what?”
“I don’t know, some toys? Let’s go and check it out.”
“I’m not quite sure…daddy wants us stay away from the attic,
and it seems to be dark there.”
“You chicken! Just follow me.”
So Helmay and Charlie climbed up to the third floor. The staircase leading to the attic was a little broken. So when they stepped on the stairs, it creaked and bent a little. The Hingesof the attic door had been rusty for a while. When they pushed hard against the door, it’s suddenly slammed open and banged hardly on the floor.
“It’s so dark here. I’m scared…”
“Coward, you can go weeping in your bed now, and I won’t share anything
I find with you.”
“I’ll tell daddy if you don’t share with me.”
“Hush…where’s the flashlight?”
Actually, the attic is not totally dark. In the south-east corner, there’s a locked window, albeit it provided not much light. The subtle sunlight illuminated the attic with a dim atmosphere, as if time and space there had been halted and congealed. Beside the boxes labeled “Helmay’s photo,” “Family tour 1997,” and “Daddy’s fishing rod,” there’s a case covered with dust.
“What’s this, May?”
“It seems like a foldable chess board. Let’s take a look!”
Helmay and Charlie took the board, rushing downstairs while they didn’t notice that, under the dim light, the case was previously placed at the center of a five-pointed star, which was drawn on the floor by chalk.

IV.
In Helmay’s room, after they clean the board, they realized it’s an antique board. The board was, perhaps, make of oak. Because it’d been used for generations, the edges of the board is polished, showing a sophisticated amber texture. The surface of the board was carved with some mysterious runes. In which language were the runes written no one can tell, while there’s a line of French written in a quaint form of gothic letters. It said: Personne qui ca ouvrs comprends sa vie.
“May, there’s something is this case!”
Charlie shook the casem and there was something in it.
“Maybe it’s the chesses! Let’s open it.”
Helamy and Charlie were so excited about this surprising gift left by their former landlord. They eagerly unhook the brass buttons which held the boards. However, when they opened the foldable chess board, both of them were astonished by what’s inside. It’s not a chess board, apparently. Instead of the neat black-and- white squares for chesses to run, on the board is a gruesome picture. It’s in a cemetery. Hideous crows rested in the trees, and the branches of the dead birches arched over into a vault. On each side of the board stood a skeleton, and a tombstone lay between them. The skeletons, dressed like two waiters, bent forward with a towel hanging off their bonny wrists and a black bow tied to their neck bone. On the tombstone, 26 alphabets, from A to Z, were listed in order. There’s an “Oui” on one end of the stone, and “Non” on the other. In the board was a red arrow-shaped plat.
“May…what’s this? It’s terrifying.”
“I don’t’ know, either. But the skulls there look really cool.”
“Perhaps we should put it back.”
“No! Let’s play it. It looks loke the game my classmates played two months ago”
“It’s a game?
“Yes, something like fortune-telling. It’s fun!”
These naïve kids had no idea what’s in their hands. This board, called oui-ja board, was once very popular through the medieval European countries. People, especially the ignorant young girls, liked to use it as a measure of predicting their husbands or love in the future. Besides horoscope and Taro, it’s another way the Gypsies easd to make a living on. Compared with hiring a psychic, oui-ja board was more easy to play. With two or more people, a board with 26 alphabets, an “Yes” and a “No,” the game could start right away. Like Taro or crystal ball, oui-ja board is activated by an unknown mysterious power. For most of the time, this supernatural force is helpful. It comes and answers some questions. However, there were still some unfortunate cases recording regrettable experiences, which were rarely mentioned and gradually buried under history. Helmay and Charlie had opened the Pandora’s Box. What would be unleashed to the world?
“Put your finger on the red plate and repeat after me”
Charlie followed his sister’s directions, pressing his index finger against the plate. And then, Helmay started to read the invocation.
“Genie, genie presents thee, show us all the mysteries.”
“Genie, genie presents thee, show us all the mysteries.”
“Genie, genie presents thee, show us all the mysteries.”
“May, it doesn’t work.”
Charlie complained after they repeated the dull line for more 5 minutes.
“Hey, patience and concentrate, you…”
When Helmay was speaking, the plate seemed to slide away a little bit.
“May, did you push the plate?”
“No, I…”
This time, the plate went about two inches. Helmay discovered the moving, and she sensed a nameless pressure had been infused into the room, stuff every corner of the space. She could clearly feel a invisible emptiness swell in the room and squeeze her body. Helmay suddenly felt being suffocated by the void. It became so huge, strangling Helmay and even bent the ground floor to squeak.
[coughing]
“Knock it off, May. It’s not funny.”
[coughing]”I didn’t…”[coughing]
When Charlie was just about to discover something wrong, the crimson arrow-shaped plate lost control, running wild all around the board.
“Stop it, May!”
“It’s not me, it the genie!
The genie has come! Stop, genie!”
Suddenly, the plate slowed down and gradually stopped, pointing at “Yes.”
“The genie has come!”
Though quite terrified, Helmay and Charlie were still surprised at the presence of this mysterious being. They were interested and curious about this little moving arrow.
“Genie, is that you?”
“Oui,” the arrow moved a bit and stooped at “Yes.”
“Genie, how old are you?” asked Charlie.
(f…i…v…e…o…n…e…s…e…v…e…n)
After Charlie asked this question, the plate moved slowly among the alphabets, spelling out a complete reply.
“It is so old,” said Charlie
“Genie, are you a man?” asked Helmay
(Non)
“She must be an old lady,” said Charlie.
“Maybe she has so many wrinkles on her face,” Charlie kept going on saying, and he make a face at Helmay.
Out of their expectation, not an elf or a fairy, the genie ended up an old spirit. Helmay
and Charlie found this game more and more interesting.
“What were you, genie?”
(w…i…t…c…h)
“May, she says she’s a witch. Is there any?” Charlie curiously asked.
“I don’t know. Maybe she has a big, big nose”
Then Helmay made a gesture to pretend to have a gigantic nose on her face. They
giggled over this scene. To Helmay and Charlie, the stereotype of witch is mostly
based on Halloween. An ugly old woman, wearing a black hat and black cloak, rides a
flying bloom over the sky and asks some candy. They had now any idea when oui-ja
board was popular, it’s also about the same time when Catholic Church was hunting
the pagan witches and quelling the heresy. Thousands of women, innocent or not,
were arrested and burned. Obviously these kids had no idea about this dark history of
witch but the funny ones for Halloween.
“Where do you live, genie?”
This time, the spirit didn’t make any response. The plate, as if sucked dried of life,
stayed unmoved.
“Where do you live, genie?”
(H…E…L…L)
This unexpected answer made the two children stunned right away. The joyful
atmosphere went chilling at one.
“May, should we stop here? I feel weird. It really freaks my out”
“Yeah, we’ve better stop here. It’s a little different when my classmates played this.”
“Thank you, genie, now go home.”
Helmay tried to send the Genie home, while she found that she couldn’t move the
plate anymore, as if it was glued to the oui-ja board. Astonished by this scene, little
Charlie’ eyes were flooded with tears, yet he was so shocked that he couldn’t even
utter a sound.
“Do you still have something to say, genie?” asked Helmay, quivering.
(Oui)
“What do you want?”
The plate moved again.
Slowly the arrow spun around, pointing at Helmay and Charlie with its sharp tip.
(y…o…u)
Then everything lost control. The plate ran crazily on the board. Faster and faster,
it flew from the desk and striked on the wall with a bang. Helmay and Charlie were
completely surprised. They couldn’t even cry for help because they were totally
stunned by the horrifying scene ahead. “Bang!” With a clap, the panes were broken
into thousands of pieces. Some of the glass fragment even cut Helmay’s arms. The
bulbs on the ceiling emitted a glaring light, it’s so bright and dazzling that Helmay
and Charlie couldn’t even open their eyes. Then from the oui-ja board bursted a huge
ball of flame. It ran onto the drapes, tablecloth, and the wines in the window. The
flame went quickly all over, everything in the room was devoured by the blaze.
Charlie was choked and in coma. The flame sticked out its burning tounge, trying to
swallow him. Hel may timely put out the fire on Charlie’s pajama, and she tried to
cover Charlie with her own body.
“Help…help…,” Helmay cried with her weak voice.
Helmay’s cry seemed useless to this ruthless fire. The fire took over the whole room
in minutes and burned everything into ash.

This fire happened in the afternoon, when most people in the neighborhood were out
to work. When the fire fighting trucks and ambulances arrived, the house was almost
done. The fire fighters and police were busy cleaning and checking the scene, while,
opposite to the burned house, hideous Mr. Koncinson sat there in the well chair, with
a weird smile on his face.

2007年11月25日 星期日

Paint me the colors of sky and rain (By 李安蘭)

Paint me the colors of sky and rain
許我一抹天空的藍與雨的清新

If I check the pics, I still can't believe it was real. It's so amazing. Thank you. Thank everyone.
如果再讓我看一次照片,我仍然不能相信這一切曾真實的在我生命中發生。謝謝你們,謝謝大家。

I've walked the distance, I paid my dues and tried to have a go at what I thought I knew was real, held no appeal
我已經走過漫漫長路,我付出了努力且試著走向我所認知的真實
I've been to places, I've seen the tidings,
我去過許多地方,也看過了許多風景
I bought a book of rules for every coin that I could steal
我用一切的力量去瞭解這世界運作的法則
And so I came to gaze upon the stars, when they were yet unborn
我也時常仰望星空,那些自太初就存在的星體

The mountains were so great and will always be great. Whatever you want, whatever you’ll get.
山林像是座極美的藏寶庫,無論你要什麼,都可從中獲得。
Not everything, for example no pinguïns up there. Although water might turn into ice, You may not find them.
當然啦,這只是種誇飾的用法。雖然說在山上水會凍成冰,但是你不會在山裡發現企鵝的存在。
I was surprised finding myself so cold at night. How could that happen?!
我很驚訝我在山上居然會覺得冷。這怎麼可能?
When I saw the ice on my backpack early in the morning, I knew why. At an altitude above 2500m it can be cold.
當我早上醒來發現我的背包上結了一層厚霜後,我就知道為什麼了。超過海拔2,500公尺的高度後,還是很冷的。
Believe me, with 4 pair of socks, 3 layers of long sleeves, hand gloves and maozi, your tools might still
freeze off while you are watching the milkyway and ten thousand sparkling stars will not give you any warmth at all.
相信我,即使穿上了四雙襪子、3件長袖上衣,手套加上頂帽子,這些裝備還是有可能失效,
在你觀賞銀河中千百顆閃閃發亮的星星時冷得直打哆嗦。
I have never seen the sky so blue in Taiwan, as I have never seen the sky so white in my whole life. But I saw it in the mountains.
我從不曾在台灣看過如此湛藍的天空,也不曾在我的一生中看到這麼白淨的天空。
但我在山裡看到了這一切。
There is magic in the air. About the magic. As I said, a dream is a wish your heart makes. A wish is made to come true, one day or another one.
周圍的大氣裡似乎運行著一種魔法。這種魔法,就我看來,就是你心中許下的願望,而這個願望是被許下,等待著它成真的一天。
More likely when you don’t expect it at all. And Only if it really comes from your heart. Weather you believe it or not; I think it’s simple like that.
甚至,你壓根就不會期待著它發生的那一刻,但它就是這麼巧妙的從你內心深處成真了。
不論你相不相信,我想,道理就是這麼的簡單。
Sometimes it’s even so unrealistic that you are not able to believe it, but you can really never never predict your futur.
有時這一切看起來就是如此的不切實際,但未來的事又有誰說得準呢?
That would be boring. Things change so fast. Everyday something different.
如果我們真能預言明天,那未來的人生就太無聊了。每一天都會有些事情悄悄的改變。
One day is grey, the next day is colored, one moment you cry, the next moment you laugh, one second you are still alive, the next one you might be dead.
昨天還是灰調的人生,今天就充滿了色彩;前一刻淚流滿面,下一刻你的臉上卻是堆滿了笑意;一秒鐘前你仍活在人事,轉眼間就天人永隔。
The greatest things in life are unpredictable. As you can’t predict, you don’t expect. That’s what makes it even more worth. Life is full of surprises.
人生中最精彩之處莫過於它充滿了不確定。 當你無法預知的時候,你也無法期待。生命,正因下一秒的不可預知而時時充滿了驚奇。

In the plane coming to Taiwan, I was looking out of a small window, watching a beautiful sunrise above the clouds.
在來台灣的飛機上,當我從機艙裡小小的窗戶望出去時,我看到了雲端上美麗的日出景象。
I was wondering how amazing it would be not to be in this little box, but flying in the sky, above the white clouds,
watching the yellow, pink, orange, red, blue, green colors changing into the sun.
我想著,要是我當時不在那小小的機艙裡,而是飛行在朵朵的白雲上,看著太陽變幻著黃的、粉紅的、橘的、紅的、藍的、綠的奇異顏色。
It was a thought and a wish I didn’t believe in, because it was not realistic at all.
當下我並不喜歡這樣的想法,因為這樣一點都不切實際。
It will never be realistic. But, it happened to become reality.
但是,這看起來一點都不真實的想法,卻恰巧成真了。
You might or might not imagine how it is to see that in real life. I can tell you that it is unbelievable amazing. Can’t believe it. So special.
也許你能,或也許你不能以現實的角度來評量這一切。但我要告訴你,這一切是如此的令人驚訝到一個難以置信的程度。如此的獨一無二。

Who do I have to thank? The God, who created everything? Nature, just for being as beautiful as nature? The mountaineering club, who gave me the opportunity to experience it?
我該感謝誰呢? 是上帝,這一切的造物主?是大自然,如同它所展現出的自然色彩?是登山隊,讓我有機會能體驗這一切?
The scholarship, who allowed me to come to Taiwan? My parents for encouraging me studying Chinese and getting the scholarship? Who cares about it? I don’t. I would like to thank everyone and be happy. =)
是贊助我來台灣的獎學金?還是是支持我學中文並取得獎學金的父母?管它的呢,我才不管這東西。但我要感謝我身邊所有的人,並保持一顆快樂的心。
As long as you believe in magic, as long as you can wonder, life will be worth living.
只要你還相信奇蹟,只要你對生命仍充滿好奇,這一生就值得你活這一遭。
There are so many amazing things everywhere around you, but if you don’t believe, you might not see.
在你的四周處處充滿了驚奇事物,但若你不相信生命的奇蹟,那你將與這些奇妙時刻錯失交臂。
And if you see, but neither wonder nor believe, it might not be worthwhile to have seen it.
沒有了這樣的相信與好奇,即使你見到了些什麼,對你來說,一切都會變得了無新意。